My name is Andrew Pearce, I’m 27 years old and I used to experience general and social anxiety but I am now living anxiety free, which I’d like to clarify for you, as I do get questions about it.
We are hard-wired with the fight/flight response, it is a part of our makeup as humans, so we will always experience fear, nervousness, increased heart rate, thoughts of doubt and worry, it’s inevitable, these things won’t go away.
So when I say anxiety free, I no longer get to the point of actually being anxious. Nervous, yes, thoughts of concern or worry, of course!
The difference is I no longer buy into the nervousness or put energy behind the negative thoughts. Through awareness, letting go, consistency and a whole lot of practice, I am now living anxiety free where fear no longer dictates the decisions I make. I feel free to be who I am and do what I want to do, and this freedom is 100% available to you too.
Growing up I had a normal childhood, it was great. Loving parents, plenty of friends, great area. So there was nothing, in particular, that was ‘bad’ or went wrong, and there doesn’t have to be.
You don’t need to have come from any kind of hardship to conquer anxiety and let go of it and there doesn’t need to be some kind of traumatic event that happened which leads to it (although this may happen). Anxiety simply is what it is, it’s completely normal, you’re not weird, or different, or weak, or pathetic.
You are perfectly normal as you are ☺
As I said above, I used to experience general and social anxiety, fears of judgement, rejection, making mistakes, saying the wrong thing, not being perfect, social situations…
Then worries about the future, failure, not being able to provide, the unknowns of life, all these types of things. Then there’s the racing thoughts, butterflies, redness in the face, the list goes on. To sum it all up anxiety can be a dick, but anxiety isn’t forever and most certainly not who you are.
After being fed up with experiencing anxiety for long enough I decided to do something about it. I started reading up on the internet, visiting Buddhist groups and saying affirmations but the biggest changes came for me when I started studying Human Behaviour and Life Coaching at The Coaching Institute in Melbourne in August 2014.
I started coaching other people, coaching myself, being coached, reading books on the workings of the mind/ego and from all of this I learnt a lot about the thinking the goes on behind the scenes that actually creates the anxiety we experience.
Fast forward 2 and a half years and I’ve now worked with hundreds of people both 1:1 and in groups, completed advanced studies and learnt a whole lot more on how to successfully create change to start living a life free of anxiety.
I’d like to share with you a few key things that I’ve learnt along the way along with a blog post I wrote about being stuck in your head.
– You must take responsibility for your experience. Anxiety isn’t your fault, it’s not your Mum or Dad’s fault, but it is your responsibility. Taking responsibility for the results in our life is the first step to creating change.
– You must be willing to do what it takes and stick with it. A lot of people want to be anxiety free, but there’s a huge difference between willing and wanting. You may want something but not be willing to do what it takes to create the change. If you’re willing to do what it takes, you’ll create the change.
– Overcoming anxiety isn’t so much about overcoming and more about letting go of the thinking that creates the anxiety in the first place.
The journey of letting go is one of freedom and relief.
Anxiety can’t hurt you and fear can’t hurt you. They may feel uncomfortable but learning to be comfortable with being uncomfortable is an absolute game changer.
Back to my story….All this thinking drove me nuts!
And I just wanted to stop thinking, get out of my head and just feel. I remember thinking to myself (haha) “I just want to feel, I just want to be present and feel.”
Now, this required getting out of my head and this was what was scary because when we live in our heads even though there is pain, there is also comfort, familiarity, and ‘safety’. Even though we’re fearful and worrying, we feel safe being fearful and worrying because we’re constantly running over every little thing of how life ‘might’ happen and we feel somewhat prepared.
That is all worrying does for us, it has us feel like we are somewhat prepared for the uncertainty that lies ahead, that’s it. So there is a payoff, there always is.
So the question is, how do you get out of your head?
It starts with trusting yourself and backing yourself. Trusting that everything will be okay and that you can handle whatever happens, and backing yourself in doing the do, taking action.
~sidenote~ You can always handle what life brings your way (the universe would never bring in something that you can’t handle). It’s not that you can’t handle something, it’s that you don’t want to have to. And if you don’t want to do anything about life then don’t expect life to do anything for you. What you put out is what you get back.
Now choosing trust is CHOOSING trust. IT IS A CHOICE. And you’re currently choosing fear and doubt so why not try something else?
So why not take a chance on trust?
Why not give it a try?
Why not back yourself?
Because sometimes we can fail at something we don’t want, so why not try doing something you love?
As I said earlier, I’ve now being working with anxiety for over 2 and a half years and have learnt a lot along the way. If you’re ready and willing to do what it takes to live anxiety free then we have an amazing 21 Day Anxiety Breakthrough Program for you that has been helping our clients create massive growth on their journey of anxiety free living.
We run the program in a private Facebook Group, live and interactive over 21 days. We go deep into the Anxiety Free Formula which has 9 Pillars of anxiety free living covering the human behaviour and thinking that goes on behind the scenes in the areas of life that contribute most to the anxiety we experience. There’s an amazing support community, homework, mentoring, feedback, live group calls, lifetime access to our membership site and more.
We run the program every 3 weeks so there’s always a chance to jump on board and grow into the person who no longer suffers from anxiety. If you’d like to get in touch to learn more about the program you can email me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org or visit our Facebook Page – https://www.facebook.com/AnxietyTaskforce/.
Here is a testimonial compilation from some of our 21 Day Graduates – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PmxIbAPDR9o.
So before I leave I’d like to thank you for taking the time to have a read of this article and know that anxiety isn’t forever, anxiety most certainly is not who you are… You are good enough, you do belong and you are loved. A life free of anxiety is available to you too and something you definitely deserve.
Here’s to you living anxiety free,